Something in the water
I have had at least 4 Muslim women I know tell me they are talking to, or dating, or whatever men that are not Muslim. This is not going to be a post downing then becuase the fact of the matter is I can understand why they might do it. Inshaallah I would never do that. BUT still the fact remainds there are sisters that feel like they have no other options or that the options they do have are worse than the sin involved in being with a non-Muslim.
I could not do that becuase I would be scared of the sin. I mean every time the man looked at me, talked to me, kissed me hugged me, or anything it would be a sin. All those sins would add up to too many for me to be comfortable with. Marriage in Islam is 1/2 our deen. I would not want to mess up that much on purpose.
The sad thing is I am sure these women feel like they have been forced into this situation. They feel like most of the Muslim men are NO GOOD. Just take a few hours out of your day and read some of the blogs and you will see why. They are filled with men that have lied, tricked, decieved, and hurt the very women they claim to love.
They are full of men that will have no probelm living off the sweat of a woman and taking from her children. All the while taking all his right but giving none in return. They have no problem taking on more wives when they can handle or afford another. They are selfish and seem to only think of themselves. They have no concern about the feeling or welfare of their wife(ves).
I am not saying all Muslim men are like this. NOT at all. If I did I would go in a corner and just lie down becuase that means there would be no chance of me ever finding a good man. I have also seen good Muslim men. NOT many but I have seen them and when I have they have been special men. Like my mothers husband. He is just a wonderful man. He is so kind, patient, loving and thoughtful I wish I could bottle him and sell him.
So there is hope. I think as mothers it is our job to train our boys to grow up into men that WE want them to be. Not leave it up to the men. I am not saying leave the men out but I am saying WE as women know what a good man is. We know what we would haev WANTED to marry. We know what we dont like, what we dont want………..why not start out teaching our sons to have the characters we would desire……….maybe then the next generation of young Muslim women will not have to do such drastic things as marry or date NON MUslims……….Just a thought
Yes, that makes very good sense. Train your sons to respect women and how to be good husbands so the next generation of Muslim women wont’ have to find good men among the unbelievers. Good point.
I feel you sister, jazakillah khairaa!
May Allah save us. Ameen
As Salaamu Alaikum My Dear:
Ya Allah! I know! A few of my sisters are in this boat. One is even married to a non-Muslim. I know it is difficult because we women all want to be loved. But we must be patient. I remember when I was trying to get married. I kept bugging my wali like crazy: “Did you find me anyone yet?” Over and over. One day he said to me, I’ll never forget it: “Safiyyah, when Allah wants you to have a husband, He’ll send you one.” Argggggggggggggg … I wanted to go off. But he was right. Allah (swt) did send me a husband. He returned my ex-husband to me. The husband who had divorced me 3 years earlier. It’s another story in itself, but suffice it to say that I did not want the divorce and it almost crushed my soul. It really tested my deen. I was in so much pain that I wanted to die! But, I kept myself “right” and Allah (swt) rewarded me, Alhamdulillah. It increased my imaan and I have NEVER doubted after that Allah (swt) will give me what I need! Alhamdulillah! And who would want a non-Muslim husband anyhow? I mean if one is a practicing Muslimah, how would that work??????
BTW: What’s up with the blog title change! (I haven’t been reading for awhile.)
Asalamu Alaykom,
(Raising my hand) Here!
Yep. I’m open to the possibility of a non-Muslim man. I have NOT shut the doors on those who are already Muslim but hey! Those brothers better get to work!
Whoever is my destiny, I will accept. Allah’s plan is best.
Who is to say that these non-Muslim men are not living their destiny right now by learning about Islam and us Muslimahs? I truly believe I am meant to know this man and we are supposed to be a part of each other’s life. Are we to marry? Couldn’t tell ya! But time will tell!
Girl, you outted yourself. I would have never mentioned ur name. Anyway, like I said I understand why doing that would be tempting I just could not see myself taking that chance………Inshaallah things will go well for u
oh, about the name change…………its in my other post:)