When is it a crime

I was over at UmmAdams Blog the other day. She has a post about R.Kelly. The post was about him and the interview he gave for BET. It is sad…….Anyway, most comments were about how bad his actions were and how he needs to stop them. One of the comments said we need to not think about westen law and look at Allah she said

R. Kelly: Fornicator…YES!
R. Kelly: Nasty and lewd…YES!!!
R. Kelly: Predator on underage victims…NO.

A victim is a victim because of his helplessness, naivete, and ignorance, NOT because of his age.

Young age DOES NOT equal victim.
Old age DOES NOT equal victim.
Naivete at any age DOES EQUAL victim.

HUMMMMMMM, I am sorry but I do not agree and I just dont get it. This man preyed on young girls. So in my mind that makes him a pretator. Yes, I agree their are SOMe young girls that are mature for their age but do you really think he went around taking time to find out who was mature or was he looking at who was cute and had a nice body.

In Islam a girl can gett married once she gets her Monthly cycle. Ok, fine but just becuase you CAn do something does not mean it is the best thing for all people . I think looking at most men that try the big P will show us that just because something is halal does not mean it is right all the time for everyone. HERE  is a good example of what I mean.

This made me look at my childhood. Whn I was 13, 14 heck even 18 I was not ready for a real relationship. Yeah I had hormones jumping and had the same urges that every other person has at that age but was I ready for sex and all it brings. NO

At 13 our bodies may be ready but our minds usually are not. Yes, I could make a baby. I could do that by age 11 but would I know what to do with one or a husband. I think not and I really think most girls that age are not. So to say if your old enough to have sex then your old enought to get married IMHO is soooooooo wrong.

Yes, we all know we need to be married in order to have sex I am not disputing this.  But I am saying just becuase you can does not make it right. Marriage is more that sex. Yes in the begining thats about all you think about cuase it is new, that personis new to you and you just want to be with them and explore all the things you have been waiting to explore.

BUT that is not a marriage that is just a phase. The real marriage comes in a you have to budget, compromise, take orders, give orders, cook, clean, maybe change diapers and deal with children, you have to deal with in laws, mood swings, arguements, and so much more.

How many 13-15 year olds do you know that are ready to deal with that. I’m looking at my almost 17 yo and she is so not ready. Man she still plays with Barbie dolls.  So I think knowing that most girls are really not as mature as they THINK they are tells me these girls were Victims.

Heck at 15 I was grown in MY HEAD. I thought I knew everything. In reality I didnt know anything. So just because a girl agrees to have sex with a man in his 30’s of her own free will does not excuse his behavior. Her saying yes does not make it OK. Her saying I knew what I was doing does not hold water, Yes, she may know what goes where and heck she may even know positions that I aint never heard of BUT that does not mean she is mentally ready to assume all the responisbilty for all the reprocutions that can happen to her becuase of her choice.

Thats why there are laws. Yes, in the west a girl at that age cannot consent to sex becuase she is usually not mentally ready for that responsibility. And this is why in many Arab countries there is a certain age a girl has to be in order to get married.

Egypt: 18 for males and females (per the new child protection law).

Senegal: 20.

Tunisia: 20 for males and 17 for females

Iran: 18 for males and 16 for females

Jordan: 16 for males and 15 for females, lunar calendar; court permission required for females under 18 to marry men older by 20 years or more.

Kuwait: No minimum marriage age identified; capacity to marry requires parties to be of age (puberty) and of sound mind, however, no notarisation or registration of marriage permitted where female has not reached 15 years or male 17 years

Lebanon: 18 for males and 17 for females

Malaysia: 21, 18 with parental consent

Pakistan: 18 for males, 16 for females

These are all Muslim countries. They all have an age limit. Most if not all are over the age of 13. There is a reason for this. Men make laws and men know men. We all know there are some men that prey on little girls. What R. Kelly did is not new. There has been and their will always be old men that only want young girls. It is our job and responsibilty to protect our girls from these pretators.  Here is an example of what happens when tere is no law to protect girls. . Would you want that to be YOUR daughter? 

We have to protect our girls. I know there are some hot mama teens out there that needs to be married just to keep them from becomming a slut. whore, no umm whats the world Im lookign for promiscuous. But really these are not the majority. Maybe in Some areas ike Philly but that is not am example of the whole world. We need to teach the girls thatare fast to have pride in their bodies and to have respect for their sexuality. If you haev a girl that is goignt o be fast, and mothers of those fast girls you knwo who they are. You need to start trainign them early to be wives and mothers or be ready to take on her and her husband in your home until they are ready to go out into the world. That is an option. If you have a girl that is hot to trot an d you want her married let her. But keep her at home so you can train her and keep an eye on her. That is better than letting her go wild or turning a blinds eyes or just saying  she knows what she is doing becuase maybe……….she doesnt.

 

~ by livinglifeandlovinit on September 25, 2008.