Why is life so hard

I always think too much. Today I have been thinking about why life, well my life, is so hard.

I am the first to say I have been blessed. Allah has given me many ups to go with my many, many downs. My question is why so many downs?

Dont get me wrong. I take all my bad times and try to learn from them, but at times , many times, I feel like they are just too much.

I would just like to have a steady period of peace. I guess we all would. I know many people are having a worse time at this life than I am; but is peace of mind too hard to ask for. And if you throw in a man  that will love me,  that would be the cherry on my ice cream.

But no, that is not my life. I have a life full of fitnah.  My biggest fitnah is MEN!!!

I long to be loved by one man. To be his wife…a man that wants me and fills my life with joy….a man that is just out of my reach… Then I am presued by another……one that can be a husband…but not the one…maybe I had my one…and he died…maybe in life you only get ONE and everyone else is there just to fill a void….Im sorry I want more than that. call me greedy but I want…….but it seems like I just dont get..so I guess…Men are and will always be  my fitnah

~ by livinglifeandlovinit on December 15, 2007.